To punish a child for disobedience - the right and wrong kinds of punishment for children in the family

In the life of each parent, there comes a time when the child ceases to obey. If only a short while ago the mother did not let go of his mother's hand, today he runs away, climbs into the cupboards, tries to grab a hot pan, and does it all as if it's "spite". That is, consciously doing something forbidden. At such times, parents decide on the use of punishment.

But the question arises — how to do it so as not to harm the psyche of the little man and not spoil the relationship with him?

Rules punishment of children in the family — what to consider when punishing the child for disobedience?

  • Punishing, don't restrict the child in meeting his physical needs. Ie, not to restrict food, drink, not set at night on the peas, as did our grandparents.
  • Punish, but not to deny love.

    The child should not get the impression that because of the misbehavior didn't love him anymore.
  • The punishment should be fair. You cannot pluck the child from the anger of a quarrel with her husband or to throw on him the indignation of the problems at work. Because young people are not to blame for your difficulties. If you hold back does not work, do not be afraid to apologize. Then the kid will not feel offended and unjustifiably punished.
  • The punishment should be proportionate to the act. For petty pranks — small punishment. For serious misconduct — a big thrashing. The kid should know what the penalty will follow for his next prank.
  • Punishment should be to have the borders of time — "three days without a computer, week without street."
  • The sequence of education. If the kid is being punished for the scattered toys, the punishment should follow in all cases a repetition of the mischief, not from case to case.
  • The punishment must be real. No need to scare the children Baba Yaga or the policeman who will take the baby if he will not listen.
  • To explain why, and not just to punish. The kid needs to understand why a particular action is prohibited.
  • The punishment should be really unwelcome. Some child will be harder to give up sweets than walking on the street, and someone will be more important than computer games and cartoons.
  • Not to humiliate the child. Phrase, uttered in the heat of the moment, could severely hurt the delicate child's soul.

Loyal forms of punishment of a child – how to discipline a child for disobedience without humiliation?

To punish the child, do not have to resort to force. In ancient times a method was invented by carrot and stick. In this punishment and reward are two opposing forces. A delicate balance between them is the main condition of successful education.

  • Instead of punishment – ignoring
    The Japanese generally try not to punish the child. The meaning of this technique lies in maintaining the desired behavior with praise and ignoring unwanted behaviour. Thus, the kid, especially if he is outgoing and gregarious, seek to model behavior, which is supported by his parents and participating in the educational process of people. But not every parent has the nerves of steel to ignore all the antics of a toddler.
  • The promise of promotion
    Familiar example — if you finish the quarter with excellent grades, then buy a new phone or eat the whole mess, get the candy.
  • To fix prank
    If a child spilled something, let them clean up after themselves, if dirty – wipe. And the next time the kid will think twice whether to Skoda, after all, to correct the consequences myself.
  • To put in a corner, to sit on a stool of punishment
    Explaining to the child what did he do, and how you upset, you need to leave the baby alone with his thoughts. But not for long. So, 3-year-old child enough to put in the corner for 3 minutes, and 5-year – 5.
  • Many misdemeanors are punished by themselves
    If you do not do Laundry, nothing to wear, if you do not clean the room, soon it will be impossible to find a favorite toy.
  • To deny a pleasant
    For a misdemeanor can be deprived of sweets, going to the movies or the promised gift.
  • The penalty stranger
    Let the kid scold strangers. Many is forces to stop a tantrum.

Is it permissible physical punishment of children – whether to punish the child with a belt?

In life there are such situations when the ban without a seat belt do not apply.

  If physical punishment remained the only form of convincing the child or preventing his dangerous actions, it is better, of course, not to take straps or any other "means of upbringing," but to confine oneself to slapping the palm over the pope.

  • Small children, for example, do not cope with their desires. It is difficult for them to abandon their leprosy and its consequences they don't think. They are so fun to draw on the walls, and mom's "impossible" for them is less important than their own desire. Sometimes a regular spanking makes the child to return to the terms of the rules and stop the pranks. Don't forget even after a light slap to ask the child for forgiveness and to embrace him, tell him how You love him, and ask not to do it.
  • The kids are older enough to work well head. They are objectively aware of what can result from their actions, so physical punishment for older children is ineffective and unacceptable .
  • Also you can not physically punish children whose leprosy caused by the disease .

It is worth remembering that the main purpose of all punishments is ensuring the safety of the child and the people around him   . And this problem, perhaps, can not be solved without prohibitions and punishments.

What do you think of the permissible methods of punishment of children are You? It is very important to know Your opinion!